Steam Giveaway 2015


Calling All Poets!

Heya, folks! Lumpz the Clown here with another exciting announcement! About a year ago, I started hearing the buzz about a little game called…Insanity’s Blade! Developed and published by Causal Bit GamesInsanity’s Blade pits the hero, Thurstan, against the very spawn of Hell in a 2D adventure chock full of action, RPG and platforming elements!

Intense violence meets intense action as Thurstan desperately fights to avenge the deaths of his family and whole fucking village! Seriously, this man has nothing to lose and will only find satisfaction once the parties responsible for this vile deed are PUT DOWN!

Here’s the official trailer to get dat ass HYPED!

I have one, count ’em, ONE Steam key to give away to ONE lucky gamer! So how does said gamer get their grubby little paws on this piece of retro-inspired awesomeness?!

How to Win

Simple. Write me a piece of awesome gaming poetry. I was gonna go with another haiku callout, but I’m not here to restrict the amazing artistic talents of our own gaming community! Technically, I want to leave this as open as possible, but I do have a couple rules, namely:

  1. It must make sense to everyone, even those who have never even played the game being discussed.
  2. The poem must follow typical poem structure.
  3. It should be funny, amusing, interesting, etc.

I hope you marked that shit on your calender, as it will not be getting bumped, changed, jaunted, spooned….NONE OF THAT SHIT!

Never been a fan of that shit anyway.

I’m not putting a cap on the number of entries being accepted, but that only puts the pressure on YOU, the writer, to give me the best shit you can possibly muster! ALL entries will be read in the next Poetry Corner entry (here’s my previous one for those who may not be familiar with the series), with the winner receiving a discreet email from me containing the one, the only, Insanity’s Blade!

Of course, I’ll also be happy to include any links to your work in the video description. You have a website, a blog, social media? Let me know and I’ll link your ass up!

How to Participate

As my last attempt was a little mish-mash, I will ONLY be accepting entries delivered via email.

SEND ALL ENTRIES to lumpztheclown[at] NO EXCEPTIONS! All other entries will be rejected outright!

Again, I’m accepting an unlimited number of entries until 11:59PM, NOVEMBER 18th, 2015! Give me your best and let’s leave these motherfuckers eyes and ears bleeding with video game awesomeness! And hey, maybe a fresh, new copy of Insanity’s Blade JUST FOR YOU!

I wish you all the best of luck, and Lumpz the Clown OUT!